The Accidental Wife (Emily and Julian)

18:52 Sat, Nov 30

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Chapter 184

We have all just arrived this morning to Puerto Rico and by all, I mean the bridal party. I'm so happy for my best friend and I can tell that she is excited for her bachelorette trip. Despite the happiness I'm feeling for her, it pains me that I'm not fully happy. I thought that by leaving I would be able to keep Silas out of my mind, but it looks like I was wrong.

Silas is pretty resilient. He hasn't stopped messaging me on all my social media accounts and he has even sent messages with Scarlett and Mum. I admire his persistence, but I hate that it appeared after I left.

I should use this trip to unwind. I should do everything in my power to stop thinking about Silas. I exhale, taking in a long shaky breath that barely reaches my lungs. I need to make the most out of this trip.

Leaving Silas is my choice. It's a decision I made after thinking for too long. Why am I questioning everything now? I sometimes feel like I'm going crazy. But I also think that what's going on in my head is normal. I have ended a relationship that lasted for more than five years. Why am I expecting myself to forget everything in the blink of an eye?

"Rosie! Aren't you coming?" Sabrina excitedly hollers. I take a deep breath and look at her with a big smile on my face. I should be a good friend and refrain from ruining her trip.

"Coming!" We're going to spend at least three hours at the spa. There are six of us and luckily, the group is bitches free. We're all amicable with one another and our main goal is to make Sabrina happy.

The atmosphere of the spa is quite soothing. I can feel my tense body gradually relaxing just by smelling the nice aroma that fills the air. Even the music is calm and relaxing.

"Would you like a masseuse or a masseur?" The receptionist asks us.

"A masseuse please," Sabrina quickly says, making the girls snicker beside her.

"It's your bachelorette trip, Rina! You gotta loosen up a little!" Ava, one of her close friends, encourages her.

"Still, I want a masseuse." Sabrina shrugs. I know that she won't pick a masseur. She has already asked me to not surprise her with a stripper, stating that she felt it was some sort of cheating.

I understand her way of thinking. When she threw me my bachelorette party, I told her I didn't want the stripper to touch me if she planned on getting me one. I was thankful that she honored my wish. "I want a masseuse too, please," I tell the receptionist. I'm not ready yet to feel another man's touch on my body. I may have taken off my ring, but that doesn't mean that I'm ready to accept anybody else.

In a way, it feels like it would be a betrayal to Silas, and betraying him is something I can never do. At the end of the day, I'm still his wife. I'm his wife until he signs the papers and gives them back to me to file them.

I lie down on the bed and the masseuse immediately starts working. My body is tense due to the thoughts running in my head. However, it relaxes under her touch. She is skilled and knows what she's doing.

I don't know when I last felt relaxed, but I can tell that her touch is doing wonders. A moan escapes my lips when she starts massaging my scalp. In some way, the thoughts stop for a few moments, giving me the chance to enjoy the music in the background. The session is supposedly an hour, but when the masseuse announces that the session is over, it feels like I have only been here for five minutes. She has done wonders. She has managed to make me relax even if there's a war going on in my head.

The next day, we spend it by the beach, but make sure not to get any sunburns, because none of us wants to look fried in her dress, especially the bride.

"Thank you for giving me the trip of a lifetime." Sabrina looks at me with so much gratefulness writterf all over her face.

Chapter 184

"Can you please stop thanking me? I say, doing up. "Yow bever this, Kate and I'm at far you're happy

"Are you happy though? Her tone is a theaks.

b

It may seem like a simple question from the stude, but in a bed. I dont kanne brow to town. Well, I know from 1 feeling and it's surely not happiness. I have experienced hugg Asher on users occasions. I have d'on experiment partial happiness. And what I'm feeling ww dot emblem

of them

If I'm going to describe how I'm feeling right now I would say I

pry Box priness at the only feeling here. I thick

I can say I'm lost. I don't want to voice out my thoughts to age, but sometimes I feel like I made a manice by walking away. The last time I felt as lost was when I woke up from the wadent able to remember the last two years of my life However, I feel like the feeling is way more aggreined co

"I think I will get there." I offer her a smile.

"If you still love him, maybe you should give him another chance my best friend ways. I sometimes find myself thinking about the same thing too, but to say I'm scared would be an vadernemers

"I'm afraid, Rina. I hate to say this, but I no longer trust Silat I can't bring myself to believe it whenever he says he's ready to change. I heard him say that a lot and do you know what happened every single time? He let me down" Ishaklly inhale and look down.

"I get it, Rosie, but I don't want you to be too hard on yourself or him Don't let your marriage go to waste because you're trying to prove something to yourself," Sabrina tells me. I'm not going to play oblivious with my best friend. I know what she means by that, so I simply nod and open the book I have been reading for the past couple of days

Am I ruining my marriage with my stubbornnew?

Am I doing the right thing?

I don't know how to find the answers to such questions. I don't know what I'm supposed to do to make sure that I'm making the right decisions.

After spending a few hours at the beach, we all head to our rooms to relax. Sabrina and I are sharing the same room. It's actually a suíte, not a room.

"I think I'm going to sleep for a long time," Sabrina murmurs as the gets under the soft white duvet

"Me too. I don't know why I always get tired after spending time at the beach. I didn't even swim for long," I say as I do the same thing. "We should be at the club at ten, so we have a lot of time to waste on sleep."

And that's what we do. We end up napping for two hours and when we wake up, I call room service to bring us dinner to our suite. I also make sure to get dinner for the rest of the girls.

After eating, we start getting ready for the party. I don't plan on getting drunk tonight. In fact, ever since Silas started getting addicted to alcohol, I started to become averse to it. It has become my enemy because it has taken away from me the man I love.

As we're getting ready, Sabrina's phone starts ringing. A crease appears between her eyebrows when she looks at the screen.

"What's going on?" I ask, setting down my mascara on the vanity.

"It's Silas," she tells me. Why is he calling her? "Should I answer?*

"It's up to you." I shrug and move away from the vanity. I open the closet, keeping myself busy with picking my outfit for the night.

"Hi Silas," she says and I close my eyes. What does he want? "Wait, what?" Her tone catches my attention, forcing me to turn to look at her. "All right. I will tell her, but I don't know how she may

react."

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She hangs up and looks at me. Is something wrong? Worry starts to gnaw at my gut.

"Is there bad news?" I ask, not knowing what to expect.

"It all depends on how you'll see this actually," she says, taking a deep breath. "Rosie, I think you may need to go to the lobby. Silas is down there and he wants to see you." SEND GIFT